Brain Warp

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(Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at PhotobucketSmart ass alert.Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket)

I received a phone call this weekend from an Irish dance mom. She was told by her daughter’s teacher that her competition dress needed jazzing up. The child is 9 or 10, and the dress is new, made especially for her. The color is perfect for her, and she looks gorgeous in it. She is in the preliminary level which is just one level away from the top.

This young dancer just placed first in her level.

And the teacher thinks the dress needs to be changed.

To make sure she places…to make sure she gets first…the dress she just wore when HER DANCING was deemed worthy of a 1st place needs to be changed…so she wins…

Can you see my problem here? I am warping my brain trying to understand this.

The teacher says the dress needs a shaped hem and a jazzier neckline…so the dancer places.

I am on the verge of running around my neighborhood, laughing hysterically, ripping off my clothes…but I don’t want to be arrested.

So the dress arrives yesterday…ID mom and I stand there and look at the dress. We look at each other and then stare at the dress some more. I finally give her my opinion: shaping the hem on this dress will not make her place better than she already has…1st place. She says that’s what she thinks. We stare at the dress a bit more. There is plenty of sparkle, but I volunteer that perhaps we could put some crystals around the neckline…so that she places first…again. The mom’s mouth is beginning to twist a little as she asks if I really think that crystals will help her place first…again. I think about it and then muse on the possiblity that the judge watching her might be susceptible to the hypnotizing abilities of the magic crystals that I will place on the neckline…so that she places first…again. After all, everyone knows that Irish dance judges are not very bright and are easily influenced by Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at PhotobucketPhoto Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucketsparkles.Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at PhotobucketPhoto Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

ID mom finally laughs, takes a breath, and says no to the shaped hem and yes to a few crystals. Just in case the magic in them can really help her daughter to place first…again. She went home to call the teacher, and since I have not heard a thing, I shall work my magic with my neckline crystals.

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11 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. lymabean
    May 08, 2007 @ 10:35:00

    Wow.

    OK, bag our overlay, we want a plain dress now. (Just kidding. Sort of.)

  2. Ann
    May 08, 2007 @ 10:41:00

    Oh lymabean, that was so NOT aimed at you! I am just flabbergasted that a TC wants to fuss with a perfectly fantastic dress…absolutely nothing wrong with it! That mind set really blows my mind.

  3. lymabean
    May 08, 2007 @ 11:18:00

    Oh, I know that’s certainly not us! I just thought if ours was even plainer, it would help balance out the craziness at the other end of the spectrum! :oP

  4. picperfic
    May 08, 2007 @ 17:21:00

    your crystals are mesmerising me so they surely will work on the judges? Mah…the crystals will work their magic on the little dancer! Is your Mum there yet? Are you better?

  5. Ann
    May 08, 2007 @ 18:49:00

    No, Mom is not here yet…Thursday. And yes, I am feeling pretty good…other than working up a sweat cleaning…for my mother!

  6. webmaster
    May 08, 2007 @ 21:36:00

    I needed a bit of a pickmeup and that definitely helpded! More bling… more bling… more bling…. say it with me…. more bling….

    😉

  7. Ann
    May 08, 2007 @ 22:41:00

    …more bling…more bling…I think it is working…

  8. Peggy
    May 08, 2007 @ 23:41:00

    That’s just boggling. Why isn’t the teacher working extra hard with the student to jazz up her dancing, so she can place first… again???

    Wouldn’t it be nice if more people would think things through? Good for you!

  9. picperfic
    May 09, 2007 @ 06:13:00

    take it easy Ann…we don’t want a relapse! How long is your Mom/Mum there for? I’m really feeling the need to see mine….NI is just too far away. It costs more to get see her than it does to get to Milan! :^(

  10. knittingwife@yahoo.com
    May 09, 2007 @ 08:10:00

    Wow. That one should go in the Hall of Fame for idiotic requests.

    But I am sure you will work your magic and it will be just stunning! Maybe she’ll get a new award … Better Than First!

  11. picperfic
    May 16, 2007 @ 04:37:00

    hope you’re having a good time with your Mom! I miss you!

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